Irresolute

It’s the day of New Years Resolutions but I decline. No, I refuse! I choose to be irresolute rather than togo through the motions of changing for a day, a few days, even a couple of weeks! I’d prefer to be irresolute: showing or feeling hesitancy; uncertain: she stood irresolute outside his door. Why? Because I have seen the difference between failed resolutions, a firm decision to do or not to do something, and a Third Step: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. Unlike virtually all Resolutions a Fourth Step has Power and a real hope for lifelong change! Will you join me today to be irresolute and consider accepting a partnership with God to really change at the essence?

What is Faith?

What is faith? The dictionary says “complete trust or confidence in someone or something.” The Bible says “Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.” The Second Step says, “came to believe a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity,” enhanced by the Third, “Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him.” I would define faith as trusting, believing there is a Power able to do what I can’t do and if you can do more than I can it doesn’t matter to me because what you do…or can do… is none of my business. So when I find a relationship comfortable t0 me, and if it is comfortable to me it’s going to be comfortable for God because if I have it wrong he’s not going to allow my comfort there. So my faith…and yours… are our own business and nobody can say we’re wrong. Having faith is good, it’s right.

We Are Equal to Other People

Coming to believe that we are equal to the people who share our lives each day and to the other men and women we meet by happenstance—this is an important gift of the Twelve Step program. Most of us, however, have had to work at self-acceptance. ~ Casey, Karen. A Life of My Own: Meditations on Hope and Acceptance (Hazelden Meditations) (p. 377). Hazelden Publishing. Kindle Edition.

Did you find it difficult to accept yourself? I certainly did.  Intelligence? I had that, believed it only because I could compare how much I knew with other's grades and understanding... But personal worth didn't show up on report cards, in some kind of evaluation of inherent worth!  For me that required  a Twelve-Step program. Reading the literature and listening to self-doubt in the stories of others, I actually learned  I'm not inferior, I'm just another Bozo on the Bus!

The Innkeeper's Christmas Eve

Twas the night before Christmas, and all up and down there were bone-weary travelers in Bethlehem town. The stern edict had gone out from Caesar himself, each man should return now to pay from his wealth. To their ancestors’ hometown they each must now go to pay taxes and tribute – all men, high and low. The descendants of David were gathering here in the village of Bethlehem; rooms were quite dear. It was late in the evening by light of the moon when a man known as Joseph asked me for a room. “I’m so sorry,” I told him, “My inn is so crammed ’tween the mats and the bedding you can’t lay a lamb.” Then he mentioned his wife, said the room was for her, and he asked me to help him, “I beg of you, sir.” I told him I’d let all the rooms – even mine – Then abruptly I started – the barn would do fine! You’d have thought I had offered a fine, regal house. He fashioned a place for her bed near the cows, then led her to lie in the haphazard bed and bundled his cloak to place under her head. I walked down the path to my own crowded dwelling but paused when I fancied a melody swelling. “Not so,” I decided, and quickened my step. “It’s that glow on their faces I cannot forget.” While I stood at the doorway to gather my thoughts and go into the inn filled with people and cots something flashed in the sky then grew bright ’til it shone – There! A brilliant new star lit the animals’ home. Right there in the doorway, my soul filled with peace, And I felt such a wonderful rush of relief. I turned toward the hill and the manger aglow. Such a radiance filled the whole valley below where a small band of shepherds stood huddled in fear as they stared toward the sky and the Being up there. Now I never had seen here on earth or up high any angels, but there was one up in the sky. The glory of God filled the sky with bright light. It seemed as I looked to be day and not night. Then he said to the shepherds who quaked with their fear, “Don’t be scared. I have great news that you’ll want to hear. For not only to you but to all of the earth I bring news of great joy in the form of a birth. For the Christ child you wait for is born here tonight and he lies in that barn where the star’s shining bright. There his mother has wrapped him in pieces of cloth and she’s laid him to sleep in a cow’s eating trough.” In a flash appeared hundreds of angels with him And the heavens were filled with the strains of a hymn: “Now to God be the glory, on earth be my peace, and may feelings of malice throughout the world cease.” Just as quick as they’d come all those angels were gone and the shepherds stood wondering ’til one said, “Come on. Let’s go see what the angels have told us about – come along, time’s a’wasting.” And he started out. All the others soon followed to where the star shone, after leaving the sheep in the valley alone. They all came to my manger and stooped to go in to the once humble place and the glory within. There Joseph was standing by Mary, his wife, who was stroking the child that first night of his life. And the song of the angels again softly rang as we knelt to the King, he whose birth they proclaimed. Then I heard the dear mother in voice, oh, so slight, “A glad CHRISTmas to all on this most holy night.”

With Gentleness and Time

When you encounter difficulties and contradictions, do not try to break them, but bend them with gentleness and time. ~ Saint Francis de Sales I'm guessing you're like me, that in more than one subject you find approaches differing from yours not only not appealing to you but wrong in your opinion for them as well. Try bending them with gentleness and time or leave them and keep your opinions for yourself.

God Finds You

I would go to the clubs with my friends, feeling fat and ugly. In the pounding music and swirling lights, I could sense my Higher Power’s presence, as if he loved me so much he was coming to find me where I was. ~ Overeaters Anonymous. Taste of Lifeline . Overeaters Anonymous, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

Have you ever felt God coming to get you, asif he loved me so much he was coming to find you where you were? God is not lost. You may have forgotten where he was. as though you misplaced him, but God made you, God loves you.He doesn't intrude but he pulls you into his loving arms when you desperately need a hug!

 

Influencing Contentious People

This is how to influence the nervous, contentious people I know: go to any length to get and keep my own peace of mind. ~ Anonymous, Overeaters. For Today (Kindle Locations 3414-3415). Overeaters Anonymous, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

contentious:  causing or likely to cause an argument; controversial; involving heated argument;  a person given to arguing or provoking argument; a contentious politician haranguing a crowd; law relating to or involving differences between contending parties. How can you change what you  expect to be a difficult encounter? Go to any length to get and keep my own peace of mind.

Love Their Best and Return Yours to them

“Let us always love the best in others—and never fear their worst.” ~ AA World Services Inc. As Bill Sees It (p. 216). A.A. World Services, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

In This Time with Love amid us We have the opportunity  to bring more love solidly and forcefully into our relationships with all around us. May we claim the love and sprinkle it liberally not only now when love abounds but when we walk in shadows as well! be blessed and share the blessings with all people our lives touch in the year about to come!

Loving Raisin Cakes

The Lord said to me, “Go, show your love to your wife again, though she is loved by another man and is an adulteress. Love her as the Lord loves the Israelites, though they turn to other gods and love the sacred raisin cakes.” ~ Hosea 3:1 (NIV) Do you love sacred raisin cakes? I don’t think I’ve tried them but would, probably! Asked about favorite Christmas memories yesterday I told of Grandmom’s saying her prune cake icing ran out the door, of which I once wrote, “Grandmom’s backyard was supposedly paved with this icing that had run out the door, but I never managed to find any edible samples. Sigh.” A dietitian asked today about food preferences and I didn’t ask for raisins or cakes. God still loves me whether I eat raisin cakes or prune cakes, whether I make good choices or poor in my contact with God!

The Mixture of Life lived

Then I lived an entire year sober, through my birthday, Christmas, problems, successes, the mixture that makes up life. ~  A.A. World Services, Inc, Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition (p. 183). A.A. World Services, Inc.. Kindle Edition. Life in Recovery may look the same as life lived outside Recovery but they are radically different! Thank Heaven we can choose a life of sane and happy usefulness!!!

I Am an Addict

I am an addict whether I want to be or not. I am an addict whether I work program or not, whether I am abstinent or not, and whether I am in recovery or not. I can be an addict in recovery, or I can be an addict in hell. I choose to be an addict in recovery. Once I broke through the denial, I had nothing left but the truth. ~ Overeaters Anonymous. Taste of Lifeline. Overeaters Anonymous, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

I am an Addict. Fifteen years ago, December 17, 2007, I stopped at a convenience store named Skinny's...yes, really! You can't make these facts up! It was a Sunday morning and and my pattern on Sundays on my way to teach Sunday School was to stop there (different places served the purpose weekdays!) I got back in the car with a cappuccino and sweet rolland announced aloud to God, "This Is Stupid" Earlier that month Psychotherapist Peggy Martin had given me the book Overeaters Anonymous, 2d edition. I had read it and knew I belonged there but who starts a "diet" a week before Christmas Eve? Well, I did! And I was right. I belonged in OA then and I belong there now! It's been a wild ride, and sometimes I've clung on while not complying, but I wouldn't trade it for anything! Do you belong too? Welcome to OA! Welcome home!! I can be an addict in recovery, or I can be an addict in hell. I choose to be an addict in recovery. Once I broke through the denial, I had nothing left but the truth.

Just In Case

Dear Me: I write this because right now I finally feel like I’m really in Recovery. Or should I say I feel like I’m a recovered compulsive eater? Someone said in the meeting today he was recovered from compulsive eating. Is that what I am? Ouch! That feels boastful, pretentious, arrogant! Not at all right. But is it wrong to deny the changes in me? Do I err in getting cocky? More than the error in claiming still I’m powerless? People who have no idea I’m in OA, that I struggled for years with food obsession, even those people see a difference, ask me why, what happened, want to know my secret. And telling them makes abstinence easier, reinforces my conviction. So…what do I call myself in the rooms? The absolute truth is I have a fatal disease of gluttony in remission only so long as I surrender every morning with reinforcing repeats as needed, I can hold on to the gift. And, Me, I want you to remember to remind me, to jerk me back to Recovery if anything I do, any word I say, any thought that pops up triggers me to know, holds me in the surrender, brings that reality to mind and I remember to do the next right thing, to think the next right thought, to find within me the Recovery I crave!

Agonizing for Perfection

He [John Wesley] instructed his preachers to “make a point of preaching perfection to believers constantly, strongly and explicitly, and all believers should mind this one thing, and continually agonize for it.” ~ Malony, H. Newton, Jr.. The Amazing John Wesley (p. 42). InterVarsity Press. Kindle Edition.

The New Oxford American Dictionary defines agonize as "undergo great mental anguish through worrying about something." And the founder of The Methodist Church wanted his preachers to "make a point of preaching perfection to believers constantly, strongly and explicitly, and all believers should mind this one thing, and continually agonize for it." Do you believe Christian perfection possible? Are you willing to agonize over achieving that mark?

An Apt Metaphor

Light is an apt metaphor for God’s revealing power: God’s word. God’s word comes from outside of us and floods our lives like light. ~ Room, The Upper. The Upper Room Disciplines 2022: A Book of Daily Devotions (p. 594). Upper Room Books. Kindle Edition.

It's too late to put out the trash when the sun sets before it's supposed to! A year ago today I fell and broke my hip putting out the trash and was gratified when strangers looking at Christmas lights came to my rescue and let familiar folks know I had a problem. This year I've been blessed to truly learn, "Light is an apt metaphor for God’s revealing power: God’s word. God’s word comes from outside of us and floods our lives like light." I've lived this year surrounded by light and love and willing helpers whether I've known them for years or met them as they hurried to get the door for me! Thanks be to God and his people!

Great People

…we gravitate toward people who aren’t intent on behaving as if they are better than us, even when they have achieved great success. These individuals appreciate us for who we are, and in the process, we are inspired to see them as gracious, loving men and women. ~ Casey, Karen. Each Day a Renewed Beginning (p. 207). Mango Media. Kindle Edition. Have you met someone important? I have several times. One governor kissed my cheek expressing gratitude for my work in putting an event together then weeks later recognized me in a crowd and brought his wife forward to meet me. One senator sat beside me and fumed that a dessert wasn’t at his plate. Several of us offered ours but he felt it necessary to lambast the server assigned to our table. I remember how I felt and the contribution each made to those feelings. I want to appreciate individuals for who they are, and know in the process, we’ll all feel better among gracious, loving men and women. Image Copyright: fuzzbones

Be Attitude 7

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God. ~ Matthew 8:8

When, therefore, we were approached by those in whom the problem had been solved, there was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at out feet. We have found much of heaven and we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of existence of which we had not even dreamed. The great fact is just this, and nothing less: That we have had deep and effective spiritual experiences* which have revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, toward our fellows and toward God’s universe. The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which  we could never do by ourselves. ~World Service, Alcoholics Anonymous; Wilson, Bill; Smith, Bob. The Big Book and A Study Guide of the 12 Steps . Anonymous Publishing. Kindle Edition.Page 25.

The transformation is amazing, whether stated with utmost simplicity, as “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God,” or with the exuberance of a newly found truth, The great fact is just this, and nothing less: That we have had deep and effective spiritual experiences* which have revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, toward our fellows and toward God’s universe. The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which  we could never do by ourselves. Surely, “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God!”

For All the Saints

People born before 1900. Pop, my paternal grandfather, was a circuit-riding Methodist preacher, taught in his youth in a rural one-room school, got the attention of the farmer boys by lifting a boulder they could not move in clearing an area for sports. Pop could have tried for Olympic glory in pole vaulting but it was an old new idea that didn’t draw him. Grandmom, his wife sought out kids living in chicken coops during the Depression to invite them to Sunday school. Granddaddy, Mother’s dad, was raised to be a Baptist preacher, named for an evangelist. Joined the Methodists, was inspired to tithe, did, when money was tight, and when giving buildings came from the tenth, was recognized as Mr. Methodist in West Texas, paid the patent fee on machinery he designed that was stolen from him when that company did not. Grandmother was a lady, more educated than her husband, a faithful helpmate and mother. I could speak of their ancestors, a precious heritage, and all of them make me who I am. I have worth, and I know that for they gave me theirs, These saints love me, and God loves me, so I will live this day without fear and be grateful for all the saints who show me the path.                              

Rhapherd Thomas Breedlove (born December 7, 1888, Irma, children Sam, Mary, and Irma Tom

Joe H. Anderson and wife Lena Lorice Anderson on 50th anniversary about 2/2/1960

Who's Got the Com?

For you have heard of my previous way of life in Judaism, how intensely I persecuted the church of God and tried to destroy it. I was advancing in Judaism beyond many of my own age among my people and was extremely zealous for the traditions of my fathers. ~ Galatians 1:13-14 (NIV) Renewing my resolve, I tried again. Some time passed, and confidence began to be replaced by cock-sureness. I could laugh at the gin mills. Now I had what it takes! (Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 5-6)

I’m in control, hear me roar! Stand aside and see me, watch what I can do. Step back, I don’t need you. Can’t you see it’s a complex whole, that ceding power causes seams? It’s not arrogance if you’re right! You know I do it well! I’m in control. God, I need to know I’m out of control when you’re really the one who’s in control.

Detachment

Detachment is not isolation, nor should it remain focused on not enabling the sick behavior of the past. Detachment is not a wall; it is a bridge across which the Al-Anon may begin a new approach to life and relationships generally. ~ Al-Anon: Family treatment Tool in Alcoholism

I don’t have to make excuses, to rescue, to comply with his wishes through resentment and belligerence. I can’t fix him, remake him, remodel him, convince him to change his ways. And it’s okay. I can quit hating him while I obey him, can quit making excuses for his actions, excuses to me and those to the world. I’m not responsible but that doesn’t mean I turn over-caring to ignoring, rescuing to throwing under buses. I can treat him with respect not because of oughts but because of wholehearted understanding of his brokenness…and of mine.

Johnny Appleseed

This is part of our life’s most important work. We plant trees whose fruit we will never see. We water dreams that will remain under the ground for our lifetime. We offer up our own hope as the soil in which others’ hopes may be planted. In doing so, we rest in the humbling hope that all of it is only a warm-up act for the glorious future that God is still persistently bringing together. ~ Room, The Upper. The Upper Room Disciplines 2022: A Book of Daily Devotions (p. 573). Upper Room Books. Kindle Edition. John Chapman, known as Johnny Appleseed's, has been gone a hundred seventy seven years but we all know about him, for he planted trees he never saw though some of us might have. We can change the world today as well as for generations to come. The world desperately needs the hope and love we can scatter for generations to come!

In the Hand of God

I have all these wonderful things—people who mean more to me than anything in the world. I shall keep all that, and I won’t have to drink, if I remember one simple thing: to keep my hand in the hand of God.~Inc, A.A. World Services. Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition (p. 104). A.A. World Services, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

Certainly we'd agree people we love  mean more than anything in the world to us. But how big is that circle?  It expands drastically as we come to know our fellow travelers on the Road to Recovery. Isn't it a beautiful thought that we recover far better as we reach out to the hand of God and keep our hands joined?