Why Do I Break my Abstinence?

Let me count the ways...

1. I remember the taste and the feeling
   like I deserve it, like a pat on the back.
2. I have extra time before interacting with others
   and want to put off social ineptness as long as possible.
3. Everybody else is doing it, I don’t want to be different.
4. In the process of eating I forget my concerns,
   my discomfort, my inability to fit in.
5. I’ve been good, it won’t hurt.
6. It brought comfort so long...maybe it will again.
7. Just one won't hurt...but ?I've never stopped at one, though.
8. They gave this party in my honor...it would be rude not to.
9. The normal eater I live with brought it home
   but doesn't want it now. It's a waste to toss it.
10. Why do I break my abstinence? I don't have a clue.

Abstinence is a state of grace by which I am balanced physically, emotionally, and spiritually. It’s about food, but it’s much more. It’s a way of living that incorporates the principles of the Twelve Steps and gives meaning to my life. ~ Abstinence, Second Edition: Members of Overeaters Anonymous Share Their Experience, Strength and Hope (Kindle Locations 296-297). Overeaters Anonymous. Kindle Edition.