Again!

Did you suffer so many things in vain—if indeed it was in vain? ~ Galatians 3:4 (NASB)

We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago. We are without defense against the first drink. ~ Alcoholics Anonymous, page 24

WhenEVER will I learn? Must I allow the same lesson to be pounded into my head again and again and AGAIN???  know I do it to myself, that I have a taste of recovery then toss it away again and again and again. But at some point I learn recovery feels better than my addiction that I don't want the illusive prize and choose to hold the real one and my experience can bless others doing what they would not do again and again and again. God, let it be sooner rather than later. Let me listen to those who have learned the lesson.