Hiding Behind a Mask

If you could see me, you’d run, screaming, alarmed, terrified. Surely you’d cross yourself, toss salt over your shoulder, do anything to avoid the curse, to distance yourself from me. So I hide. I hide in food like a child, covering his own face and assuming invisibility. I hide in people pleasing to act as if I were finished, polished, real… I hide in silence, knowing you can’t judge words I don’t speak. I hide in ferocity making myself unloveable so I can believe I’ll never be loved. I hide in monotony, not doing the things that would lighten my load. I stand here in my mask, eager, hoping you won’t jerk it away, toss it beyond the moon.