Human Again

Oops! I've been human again. Lord, please take this burden. ~ Sharon D

I mess up. Not so often as it was
when I had to run the world,
but I do. Things come from my mouth
and I wonder what alien put them there!
I resolve a clean abstinence
and seem to seek out something wrong
to stuff in my mouth before a moment's gone.
Like the Apostle Paul I want to scream,
"I know what to do, I really do,
so why is it I do the opposite!!?"
I could beat myself up. Would have,
back then, when I expected perfection
and didn't even know it, just knew
I lived life wrong. But I'm not in charge,
need not carry the load. I can surrender,
release it, and seek help to choose better
the next time I head for a train wreck.