Reticence

 Moses said to the Lord, “Pardon your servant, Lord. I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.” The Lord said to him, “Who gave human beings their mouths? Who makes them deaf or mute? Who gives them sight or makes them blind? Is it not I, the Lord?Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say."  But Moses said, “Pardon your servant, Lord. Please send someone else.”~ Exodus 4:10-13 (NIV)

Reticent: reserved, withdrawn, introverted,
restrained, inhibited, diffident, shy,
modest, unassuming, shrinking, distant,
undemonstrative, mum, uncommunicative,
taciturn, silent, guarded,
playing one’s cards close to one’s chest,
wouldn’t say boo to a goose.
Step Twelve:  Having had
a spiritual awakening
as the result of these Steps,
we tried to carry this message
to compulsive overeaters
and to practice these principles
in all our affairs.
Moses stood there, talking with God
but pled inadequate when sent to serve.
How, when Moses had been shown wonders,
yet still felt inadequate,
could I possibly have the audacity
to speak to someone about miracles
I knew had happened in my life?
I can’t walk up to a stranger,
even an acquaintance,
say I looked like you most of my life,
would you like to overcome obesity?
How would I have felt on the receiving side?
But really, Twelfth Stepping need not be that rude.
I can speak to people who knew me,
who can see the change…one akin
in magnitude to a staff becoming a snake
then reverting to a staff…
I can be bold enough to share
how a miracle happened to me,
how it can happen to them…
I can share my transformation
without embarrassment
because I know the wonder
of finding Recovery
and becoming the person
I always hoped to be!