The Meeting Location Doorknob

 

Around this time our big A.A. book was being written, and it all became much simpler; we had a definite formula that some sixty of us agreed was the middle course for all alcoholics who wanted sobriety, and that formula has not been changed one iota down through the years. I don’t think the boys were completely convinced of my personality change, for they fought shy of including my story in the book, so my only contribution to their literary efforts was my firm conviction—since I was still a theological rebel—that the word God should be qualified with the phrase “as we understand Him”—for that was the only way I could accept spirituality. ~ “The Vicious Cycle” story from A.A. World Services Inc.  Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition . A.A. World Services, Inc. Kindle Edition.

I’ve never questioned a God as I understand God.
I’ve written literature for two denominations,
taken a course in New Testament Greek,
been church staff in three congregations,
a volunteer in several others…
I’ve never questioned a God as I understand God.
Where I have difficulties is in talking to that God.
I can repeat by rote prayers of all kinds,
can ask God’s blessings on a long list
of names and situations I said I would pray for,
but in all those years and situations
I’ve never gotten comfortable chatting with God.
There was one time fifty-two summers ago
I went into a tiny chapel and presented the alternatives
I must soon choose between, and God told me clearly
the correct choice. I remember the sensation
of knowing the right decision…the one I was afraid of,
the uncomfortable one.
But I’ve sat with the disciples often,
begging, “Lord, teach me to pray!”
Yet I still struggle with prayer and meditation.
But something happened today!
Donna A. told a recovery group
of hearing it said in another,
“If you don’t have a Higher Power
consider the doorknob to this room
as a Higher Power until you find another!”
I choose to learn to pray daily or hourly,
or without ceasing, so I’ll substitute any doorknob
to be God as I Understand God
and an ever-present help in time of need…
which is to say always!