Stay in the Lifeboat

What is a lifeboat?
A ship's boat,
designed to be readily able
to rescue and maintain persons
from a sinking vessel.
For a compulsive overeater,
what is the equivalent?
What is necessary to stay afloat
on rough seas of Recovery?
The nine tools are a Plan of Eating,
Sponsorship, Meetings,
Telephone, Writing,
Literature, an Action Plan,
Anonymity, and Service.
Until 1995 Abstinence was listed
instead of a Plan of Eating.
The understanding since then
has been that Abstinence
is inherent in our primary purpose
set out in the preamble:
”Our primary purpose
is to abstain from compulsive overeating
and to carry this message
of recovery to those
who still suffer.”
Abstinence is much more than a tool.
Abstinence is our Primary Purpose,
our lifeboat to rescue and maintain us
from the sinking vessel
that brought us to O.A.,
compulsive food behaviors.

Freedom From Anger

Let the golden light of healing shine upon all we love and upon all with whom we feel anger. Let the golden light of healing shine on us. Trust that a healing is taking place, now. ~ Beattie, Melody. The Language of Letting Go: Hazelden Meditation Series (p. 117). Hazelden Publishing. Kindle Edition.

Healing is the essence of the middle steps,
the focal-point of Recovery.
Steps One, Two, and Three
identify the predicament
and set out the answer:
I can't, God can,
I think I'll let Him.
Steps Ten, Eleven and Twelve
deal with holding on to
the wisdom of One, Two,
and Three, and living in peace
forever more...
but that peace comes the middle steps.
Four is finding the anger
and examining it to find your part.
Five is sharing the unearthed secrets
with God and a person.
Six and Seven look for your
habits of dealing with anger
and allowing their demise.
Eight and Nine deal with listing
then contacting those your anger hurt.
At that point we have learned
to let the golden light of healing
shine upon all we love
and upon all with whom we feel anger.
Including ourselves...
finding the result is truly
freedom from anger.

Finding Your Sponsor

To find a sponsor,
look for someone
who has what you want
and ask how he or she
is achieving it.

Simple enough
if you know what you want.
Do you need someone
old enough to be your parent,
a familiar, comfortable
affinity? Or is a parent/child
feeling the last thing you want?
Does their past sound like yours
and their present something
you could only dream of?
Is what they share the kind of wisdom
you would welcome hearing it often?
Sometimes you can't put it in words;
your heart decides and the words just come.

Lessons from a Gaggle of Geese

The geese come in  the morning
or midday or late in the evening,
in twos or threes or sevens or tens.
They wander into yards, fifty feet
or more from the water. They meander,
calm, at peace, comfortable
with their mates or as a solitary wanderer,
aware of their surroundings,
ready to move toward the water
when concerned, knowing safety.
We can find our own contented
moments, alone or with friends,
a community of individuals,
caring for companions but
aware where our safe haven lies,
peaceful, calm, and comfortable.

You Decide

Most of who we are, what we do, and where we are going relates to our attitude. Being tired, bored, scared, or unhappy are decisions, nothing more. ~ Casey, Karen. Keepers of The Wisdom Daily Meditations: Reflections From Lives Well Lived (Kindle Locations 1591-1592). Hazelden Publishing.

I have decided to find truth
above and beyond sitting in this recliner
and meeting the needs of the dogs,
myself, my husband and the household.
I am not going to dwell on mobility issues,
on the effects of a stroke making typing hunt-and-peck,
on wishing the house were less cluttered,
I am reading daily twelve meditation books,
two Christian daily readings,
selections from A Course of Miracles
and The Power of Now,
and OneYearBibleOnline,
and writing a Recovery Daily Dose poem...
and to my utter amazement loving my life.
I pray to be led from negative thoughts,
from the "poor-me" habits.
I pray to look ahead but to cherish now,
and to envision the glory of God.
I want to be joyful in the present,
thrilled that all is well,
and aware of the mystery and wonder
all around.
I will bless those that might rattle my peace
and will them their own peace.

Find a God

When food controls you, find a god,
a power that suits you, one you choose.
you can't control, but your god can.
Cede your hold and trust he can.

Work through your fears and find your part.
When food controls you, find a god,tell your god the fears with someone else
and let god take your flaws as well.

List folks you've hurt and then prepare
to admit to them how you harmed them.
When food controls you, find a god,and peace will come in all your life.

You start with food out of control
and a day at a time find joy 
in a life beyond  all your dreams
When food controls you, find a god.

Accursed

AAs we have said before, so I say again now, if any man is preaching to you a gospel contrary to what you received, he is to be accursed! ~ Galatians 1:9  NASB

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I seemed to be able to snap back the next morning better than most of my fellow drinkers, who were cursed (or perhaps blessed) with a great deal of morning-after nausea. (Alcoholics Anonymous, "The Doctor's Nightmare")

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God as I understand God

loves.  Period.

So, to be accursed?

Invoking supernatural power

to inflict harm, punishment?

God is god, in control,

has no need to call on himself

or his underlings to punish, harm.

Be afflicted with?

That one makes sense. I surely can

and do

curse myself, cause me misery,

agony, separation

from God, from all.

I need the right message,

the one from both Big Books

as my guide.

And when I stray and feel accursed,

it's a blessing, beckoning.

God, let me not curse myself

but always seek your love,

your blessings.

I Put My Hand in Yours

A flyer had been published
by Overeaters Anonymous,

To Anyone Starting an 
Overeaters Anonymous Group
and a nacent Lifeline Magazine
had begun, but otherwise
Alcoholics Anonymous literature
was used...until fifty years ago
when, as our founder wrote,

"I envisioned myself
and the older members
physically reaching out
to all those who came after us.
As the idea took shape,
that image became
the theme of the new book..."
the first book published by O.A.

The Feed-Them Syndrome

They mean to be kind,
the hosts who accept the role
of furnishing treats for all who come.
They back off when told
it's not on the food plan
but a week gone by
they're offering treats once more.

Higher Wisdom

Dear brothers and sisters, I want you to understand that the gospel message I preach is not based on mere human reasoning. I received my message from no human source, and no one taught me. Instead, I received it by direct revelation from Jesus Christ. ~ Galatians 1:1 (NLT)

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We used to amuse ourselves by cynically dissecting spiritual beliefs and practices when we might have observed that many spiritually-minded persons of all races, colors, and creeds were demonstrating a degree of stability, happiness and usefulness which we should have sought ourselves. (Alcoholics Anonymous, page 49)

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Human reasoning.
If I can't convince myself
right now my own logic
trumps all others,
I look to wisdom
of the elders,
the sages,
the erudite of ages.
Tea leaves, ouija boards,
crystal balls,
divine revelation
feel gullible,
juvenile, naive.
Before tossing bath water,
though,
I should check for babies.Higher source,
teach me to trust your
higher wisdom.

Adding Pleasure and Joy

But a pleasant and happy life comes not from external things, but, on the contrary, man draws on his own character as a source from which to add the element of pleasure and joy to the things which surround him. ~ Plutarch

We tried external things, built our lives
around them, living for pleasure,
for recognition, admiration, escape,
whatever we got from others.
Then we found Recovery, surrendered control,
relied on the real, discarding pretense.
We learned who we were, discovered peace,
self-respect, real joy, and a life worth living
for the rest of our lives.

Who I Want in My Life

Today I can take an active role in fulfilling my needs. I can choose to become someone I would want to have in my life. ~ Family Groups, Al-Anon. Courage to Change—One Day at a Time in Al‑Anon II (Kindle Locations 1438-1439). Al-Anon Family Groups. Kindle Edition.

Proverbs says, "A man who has friends must himself be friendly.
As we search for ways to be liked, to be respected, to have friends,
we can treat the people we live with, work with, play with,
recover with as friends  and we will find everyone we know,
all we meet, as our friends and they will become our friends
as we become theirs.

To My Regret

Dear Regret—
Yes, I call you "dear" as well as "regret"
understanding the innate conflict.
You ranked high on my resentments
for that Fourth Step I did in 2008.
The problem was you weren't a regret
then...except my regret
I had been dealt with so poorly.
And the others involved
refused to let me sue.
Now I understand my arrogance
blurred my understanding.
I thought I knew her well
but her arrogance matched my own.
No, I call you dear, my regret,
because you taught me
I was not better than she,
even if  I was more intelligent
and better educated, but she deserved
respect as a person and my understanding
her hopes and longings
even when they stood in conflict with my own.

Respectable

…there is as much dignity in tilling a field as in writing a poem. ~ Booker T. Washington

What was respectable during childhood?Mother's acceptable behaviors
clashed with Grandmom's, Daddy's mom.
And I took after Grandmom and the rejection rubbed off.
As far as writing poems, Mother did.
I can't imagine Grandmon's, though she played piano by ear
and sang. We know the admirable aptitudes around us
and we carry the judgmental assessments long after.
When I was a child, I spake as a child,
I understood as a child, I thought as a child:
but when I became a man, I put away childish things.
But have we? Do we still cringe when we act
against parental mores? Do we now believe...
or can we...childish things can be put away?

Guilty!

I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I do not set aside the grace of God, for if righteousness could be gained through the law, Christ died for nothing!” ~ Galatians 2:21 (NIV)

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But there is One who has all power—that One is God. May you find Him now!
Half measures availed us nothing. We stood at the turning point. we asked His protection and care with complete abandon. ~ Alcoholics Anonymous (Kindle Locations 906-908).

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Who would choose to set grace aside?
God's unmerited love...
would you decline just because
you had not earned it,
it felt like charity?
A being possessing all power?
Who would not seek out and find
this greatest of great,
this source of, well, all power?
But how intimidating, how humiliating...
who would decline to search for the source?

The law I understand,
the give and take,
punishment for failure,
judgment for those who prove
they deserve it...
beyond a reasonable doubt.
Who expects justice through the law?

 

God, I'm drawn to wrong answers
but they don't give me peace, happiness.
Teach me to accept grace, to seek
the source of all power,
and to know the law gains me nothing.

My Right!

The riches of a full life are so easily mine, and so deservedly mine. ~ Casey, Karen. Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women (Kindle Locations 1196-1206). Hazelden Publishing.

I have a right to the good stuff!
I deserve to laugh, to sing,
to soak in the sunlight.

I can have peace, be productive,
find meaning and purpose
for each and every day.
I claim these privileges
not only for today
but for each day to come
because I deserve
the riches of a full life!

God As We Understand God

We should take care not to make the intellect our God. ~ Albert Einstein 

Agnostics and atheists are welcome
as are people who found the god
they met as children ungodly.
The Spirit of the Universe, music,
nature, the universe, humanity
and love can be your Power,
or the chair that holds you up...
you're free to choose.
But be careful the
Power really exceeds your own.
Why would Intellect be different?
The question is, What IS intellect?
Is it the wisdom of the ages
or your mind's analytical process?
Wisdom works, but your mind
us part of you. We all failed
at running the universe
so let us seek a higher higher power
than one we control.

A Recovery Haiban

millstone, while your attempts to attain relief become dependence, then addiction, surrounded by fake friends as dysfunctional as you. You fantasize of a pipe dream community whose degradation paralleled your own but resign yourself to solitary wretchedness.

friends await
to welcome you
to recovery 

 

Remember Tradition Ten

10. Overeaters Anonymous has no opinion on outside issues; hence the OA name ought never be drawn into public controversy.

I guess you've noticed
we don't agree on politics,
federal, state or local,
and cannot discuss the subject.
Possessing guns or banning them,
we don't agree nor
agree to disagree.
God as I or you understand Him
differs from church teachings
for someone sitting here.
The only thing we agree on
is how vitally important
OA is to us, so nevermind
avoiding public controversy.
Lets keep this pure for us!

Brush Fire

You act like I started an inferno,
taking a break from program
to get a few problems resolved.
It's nothing like that -- just a controlled burn.
I can't come to meetings until it's out
or report to a sponsor, or plan my food.
It's under control, if I can see to it
without distractions of working a program.
It's taking longer than I thought...
leave me alone! Can't you see?
I've got an inferno here.
Who has time for program?

Battle Cry

Do you buy food for the family
then eat it before they get home?
We understand. We've been there.
Welcome home!
Do you eat Halloween candy
and Easter eggs from your children's supply?
We understand. We've been there.
Welcome home!Do you go through a drive through
but stop when the server
knows your order as you arrive?
We understand. We've been there.
Welcome home!Do you avoid getting a plate
for refreshments then stand near,
nibbling finger food?
We understand. We've been there.
Welcome home!Do you drink diet cola with a giant sweet-roll?
We understand. We've been there.
Welcome home!Do you wear clothes skin-tight
because you swore you'd be thin
before you bought more?
Do you buy a dozen donuts for the office
and toss the empty box in the trash as you enter?
We understand. We've been there.
Welcome home!Are you disgusted beyond belief,
feel like a failure, wish you were dead?
Relax. We love you.
We understand. We've been there.
Welcome home!

Positive Results

Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you'll start having positive results. ~Willie Nelson

Believe you cannot and you cannot.
Believe it's hopeless and it's hopeless.
Believe you're going to fail and failure's guaranteed.
Believe you can, try it, and you do.
Hope you can, make the effort and your hopes happen.
Accept you have the right to succeed and success is yours.
The body wins when the mind won't concede.
If you can imagine it, you can achieve it.
If you can dream it, you can become it.
Be positive when you talk to yourself
for you are listening. To succeed, believe.
When you believe you succeed.
Once you replace negative thoughts
with positive ones,
you'll start having positive results.

ironmoe

Worrying About Food

²⁹ “And don’t be concerned about what to eat and what to drink. Don’t worry about such things. ³⁰ These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers all over the world, but your Father already knows your needs.³¹ Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and he will give you everything you need. ~ Luke 12:28-31 (NLT)

Overeaters Anonymous has similarities
with these words of Jesus.
Others may see the purpose precisely
as being concerned about what to consume.
We are not a diet club...calories and points
have no role. We would agree these things
"dominate the thoughts of unbelievers"
but we have decided to turn such concerns
over to God, however we understand God,
and to trust God to take care of our disease
of compulsive eating, the needs for nourishment
as well as for abstinence from harmful eating.
And we trust God to give us everything we need,
to allow our reliance on God to lead us,
to love us and to teach us how to love ourselves.

A Relationship with My Higher Power

How do you build a friendship?
By spending time together.
And if the friend is omniscient,
ubiquitous, supreme...
if you came to believe this companion
could restore you to sanity,
could bring you peace
and satisfaction beyond your dreams,
could we not linger,
hover, persist in  companionship,
knowing when we lapse in awareness
our confidante understands
and accepts our effort?

Murmuration

Overeaters Anonymous 

is a Fellowship of individuals
who, through shared experience,
strength, and hope, are recovering
from compulsive overeating.
We welcome everyone
who wants to stop eating compulsively.
There are no dues or fees for members;
we are self-supporting
through our own contributions,
neither soliciting nor accepting
outside donations.
OA is not affiliated
with any public or private organization,
political movement, ideology,
or religious doctrine;
we take no position
on outside issues.
Our primary purpose
is to abstain from
compulsive eating
and compulsive food behaviors
and to carry the message of recovery
through the Twelve Steps of OA
to those who still suffer.

Murmuration.
he act of murmuring
the utterance
of low continuous sounds
or complaining noises.
How did you feel when you came to OA?
Did the long readings seem strange?
Remember. Always.
Welcome the newcomer,
answer their questions,
be a friendly face,
a person to hug...or not...

as needed.

Keep Coming Back

It's great to have you,
I know you're pleased
with the changes
these last few months.
I notice though
you've missed some meetings
and came in late for others.
It's a simple program

and you've done well
but I've found like others
it's a commitment made
a day at a time, for life.
You sit in these rooms
long enough and you learn
a basic truth.
Those people who stop coming back
are the ones who fail to hear
tales told by those who stopped
then found the folk who stop coming back
don't hear what happens
to folk who don't come back.

Compulsive

From the diet pills prescribed for
a thirteen-year-old me
through plus sizes, high school and college
band uniforms requiring alteration,
the fabric between my legs
wearing out first, clothes bought
in special stores, dieting
for forty-eight years, gaining
more than I lost, trying everything
to end the compulsion to eat.
But stopping was beyond my grasp.
Doctors, counselors, pills,
hypnosis, metal pins in ears,
fasting...failing, hopeless,
desperate. A counselor understood
from her twenty years sober
in Alcoholics Anonymmous
that Overeaters Anonymous
could end the compulsion,
and finally, almost sixty,
I found the compulsion
could put a stop to hopeless
and begin to nurture hope.

Vacation Abstinence

What happens to a food plan
on a 20-hour flight,
when you visit destinations
are known for foods you shouldn't eat,
or you are a guest of cooks
who set their menu without consultation?
Can you visit a cacao farm
without trying the chocolate produced?
Can you travel without triggering
a relapse? The answer is, "Yes."
Two thousand miles from home
it's still true that nothing tastes as good
as abstinence feels. Enjoy the sights,
the sounds, the people...
Have a meaningful trip finding joy
in serenity. Take your Higher Power
on the trip and surrender as needed.

My Secret

Nothing I see in this room [on this street, from this window, in this place] means anything. ~ Dr. Helen Schucman. A Course in Miracles (Kindle Locations 14146-14147). Foundation for Inner Peace. Kindle Edition.

Nothing I see today means anything.
The chihuahua I hear snoring in my husband's lap
doesn't mean anything, nor does my husband.
I can't see the poodle at all, just the towel
for his use on the couch and the cushions
he pushed to the floor, but wherever Honeybear is,
probably at the breakfast nook window, but the poodle,
the towel, the cushions, the window don't mean anything.
The ancient wheaten terrier beside my chair,
close to me where he chooses to be,
and these days so a gentle hand on his head
with the aid of carpet, grass, or an old towel
tossed before him to aid his standing
is a welcome help...he, too, means nothing.

Maybe it's nothing, but do

I have this wrong? If nothing means anything,
is that the same as everything meaning nothing?

Make a Miracle!

What do we need to make a miracle? Willingness. A change of the mind will result in a miracle every time we are willing to give up the ego’s perspective of whatever situation is distressing us. ~ Daily Meditations for Practicing the Course by Karen Casey

What's a miracle?
An extraordinary event
manifesting divine intervention
in human affairs?
or merely
an extremely outstanding
or unusual event, thing,
or accomplishment?
Or perhaps
a divinely natural phenomenon
experienced humanly
as the fulfillment of spiritual law?
The divine part...isn't that inherent
among Recovery people?
Are we not a people of miracles?
Isn't it a miracle when we go through a day
without reverting to our crutches?
We can surrender our ego
to God as we understand him
and leave our crutches on the wayside.

Peace Be With You

While they were still talking about this, Jesus himself stood among them and said to them, “Peace be with you.” ~ Luke 24:36 NIV

Peace. The greatest gift.
The most generous blessing.
The fondest desire of our hearts.
The foundation of a good life.
The sign of a life worth living.
Peace. The promise of the risen Christ
to the apostles, to the women,
to Thomas in his doubting,
to us on this Easter Sunday.