A GI's Gift

Olive drab is basic pain, endless hikes in drizzling rain. Blue is Christmas TDY, raucous joy so I won’t cry. Red courage stains on desert sands, youth drained out in cruel lands, white-knuckled fear, all fossilize this PFC with gaping eyes. That’s the gift I give to you, olive drab, red, white, and blue.

Giving Is Better

Give, do not lend; after death who will thank you? ~ E. M. Forster

Paying it forward is an ancient idea but fresh and new. I learned long ago lending money to someone careless…or broke… when it came due left me resenting them… but myself more…and now I ask people to play it forward and make both of us feel better. I know, too, how much more the same amount is worth at some points in life than at others. So I agree with Forster but phrase it differently.

The Kind of Person

If you show up at the gym five days in a row—even if it’s just for two minutes—you are casting votes for your new identity. You’re not worried about getting in shape. You’re focused on becoming the type of person who doesn’t miss workouts. You’re taking the smallest action that confirms the type of person you want to be. ~ Clear, James. Atomic Habits (p. 165). Penguin Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Casting votes for your new identity? I like that. And I welcome the idea that the smallest action in the right pattern can confirm the kind of person I want to be. There’s a file cabinet in the spare bedroom with years of research on a book I committed twenty-six years ago to write. It’s changed through the years from a children’s book to a three volume tome on the subject. So if I spend two minutes a day picking up a file folder and seeing what’s there it can start the habit that eventually will lead to a manuscript ready to submit to university presses. The kind of person I want to be is the author of a scholarly work. And I’ll get there building a pattern, a habit, of moving in the right direction.

Inner Wisdom

…relying on our inner wisdom to tell us we’re worthy and believing we are worthy are untapped skills for most of us. Fortunately, we are in the right place to acquire these skills. ~ Casey, Karen. A Life of My Own: Meditations on Hope and Acceptance (Hazelden Meditations Book 1) . Hazelden Publishing. Kindle Edition.

Do you believe you’re worthy? Do you respect yourself? Are you proud of who you are? of what you’ve done, of what you can do? Are these strange-sounding questions to you? Would you be exercising untapped skills to try to make the answers yes? Give it a try! You’re worthy to have the skills, and even more to recognize and acknowledge them!

Image Copyright : Bram Janssens

Now if Joshua had succeeded in giving them this rest, God would not have spoken about another day of rest still to come. So there is a special rest still waiting for the people of God. For all who have entered into God’s rest have rested from their labors, just as God did after creating the world. So let us do our best to enter that rest. But if we disobey God, as the people of Israel did, we will fall. ~ Hebrews 4:8-11 (NLT) As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day “Thy will be done.” We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions. We become much more efficient. We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves.~ Alcoholics Anonymous, Pages 87-88

Now if Joshua had succeeded in giving them this rest, God would not have spoken about another day of rest still to come. So there is a special rest still waiting for the people of God. For all who have entered into God’s rest have rested from their labors, just as God did after creating the world. So let us do our best to enter that rest. But if we disobey God, as the people of Israel did, we will fall. ~ Hebrews 4:8-11 (NLT) As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day “Thy will be done.” We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions. We become much more efficient. We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves.~ Alcoholics Anonymous, Pages 87-88 Special rest waits for us, for God’s folk. Special rest in a pause, a reality check on show-running, in trading will-power for the will of God. Danger dissipates, fear dissolves, foot-in-mouth syndrome cured. Special rest rewarded by more energy than ever could be crammed in any minuscule bottle for ransom at cash registers. God, lead me by still waters, restore my soul, fill my cup brimful.

Standing by the Fire

Who has not made mistakes in life. Do you know Psalm 130?…Well, when you want to stay warm you stand by the fire. ~ Jacob in Twist of Faith Israel, put your hope in the Lord, for with the Lord is unfailing love and with him is full redemption. ~ Psalm 130:7 NIV

Stand by the fire. Don’t look for warmth, for comfort in the icy wilderness. Don’t seek heat in a frozen wasteland. Go to the source, the life, the hot-blooded warm-hearted, the wellspring. When you need love go where it grows, where it warms heart and hand, where you’re loved. Energy awaits your melancholia, and/or your depression, your despair, your hopelessness. Love stands ready to welcome you home.

Giving Up Control

Giving up control means growing up: my experience broadens, my pleasures expand, my usefulness to others increases and my horizon— like God’s world—is limitless. ~ Anonymous, Overeaters. For Today (Kindle Locations 2264-2266). Overeaters Anonymous, Inc. Kindle Edition.

Giving up control means growing up? It’s a surprising comparison but totally logical! The difference is extreme. Turning over control of our lives and over to God as we understand God. It’s like the Big Book says, Established on such a footing we became less and less interested i n ourselves, our little plans and designs. More and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life. As we felt new power flow in, as we enjoyed peace of mind, as we discovered we could face life successfully, as we became conscious of His presence, we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow or the hereafter. We were reborn.

First Turn Around

Walking to kindergarten then home was easy. Past the Brenneman’s house to the end of the block then I could see the Thompson’s house, the goal. But first grade at Roscoe Wilson Elementary was different, lots further. Mother took me and picked me up for weeks, as we talked about each turn, and the landmarks I’d see. Then came the day! I remembered each turn but the landmarks were wrong. I had enough sense to run back where I’d come. A teacher I didn’t know found me. I knew the address and she drove me home. I never forgot again… First, turn around!! Start from the correct corner of the school.

God, Help Us Out, Please

O God, our help in ages past, our hope for years to come, our shelter from the stormy blast, and our eternal home… God, we’ve made a mess here and need your rescue. We in flyover country may or may not have have voted folks in whose actions determine the course but Covid-infected trespassers in our land are being dumped on the Salvation Army in our town. And halfway around the world innocent friends and countrymen fear for their lives and those of innocents. Help us, God, we’ve got a mess on our hands. Show us how to love the rest of humanity, how to live lives of peace that you can spread throughout the world!

Nothing Changes if Nothing Changes

I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. Once I realized what living healthily felt like, I was able to recognize how draining the day-to-day motions had been when I was drinking all the time. Though it took some time to resonate with me, I think this is a saying most people in recovery can identify with. ~ Beth L.

Drinking was never my problem. But compulsively eating, preferably in secret certainly was! How I convinced myself that a morbidly obese woman was keeping secret eating secret escapes even me? Of course I didn’t even when I would stop the “secret” purchases as soon as the clerk knew from many past visits what gooey sugar-packed treat I was going to order. I stopped frequenting that store and drove to a competitor’s window, until that clerk followed suit. Finally, though, something changed! I began following a sugar-free flour-free plan, with planned and measured meals and no snacks. Followed for seventeen months the body changed and the legs I lifted in getting out of bed looked nothing like mine!! Important things change in behavior changes! And I’m so glad to be the proof!

What Is Due?

Give to everyone what you owe them: If you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then revenue; if respect, then respect; if honor, then honor. ~ Romans 13:7

Is it yours? Do you have a greater right to it than anyone else? Did you use someone else’s idea and claim it was yours? Did you cut corners? What about the ticket for food and service with a suggested tip? Are you slighting someone if you don’t tip? I remember decades ago using money I had set aside in a college fund for a child when I was short of funds and overdrawn. I made it right but it wasn’t mine to spend. Paul was speaking along the line of Jesus’ words, render unto Caesar….” The word revenue certainly fits. But the meaning includes returning what you borrowed months or years ago. Where is the peace you need in instructions to give to everyone what you owe them?

Cravings

Your brain did not evolve with a desire to smoke cigarettes or to check Instagram or to play video games. At a deep level, you simply want to reduce uncertainty and relieve anxiety, to win social acceptance and approval, or to achieve status. Look at nearly any product that is habit-forming and you’ll see that it does not create a new motivation, but rather latches onto the underlying motives of human nature. ~ Clear, James. Atomic Habits (p. 127). Penguin Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Do you want to reduce uncertainty and relieve anxiety, to win social acceptance and approval, or to achieve status? What are the underlying motives of human nature? Do we all want to feel secure in the path we’re walking? Do we all want to be a part of rather than apart from? Do we try to hide from life through computer games, trashy novels, stuffing our face? are you anxious, embarrassed, intimidated? Isn’t it true you really want to feel different? What behaviors could you substitute for what you choose to do when what you want, what you crave is to avoid the feelings you loathe?

Rules, Rules, Rules

Is the law, therefore, opposed to the promises of God? Absolutely not! For if a law had been given that could impart life, then righteousness would certainly have come by the law. But Scripture has locked up everything under the control of sin, so that what was promised, being given through faith in Jesus Christ, might be given to those who believe. ~ Galatians 3: 1-22 (NIV) I was at one time assistant manager of a corporation department employing sixty-six hundred men. One day my secretary came in saying that Mr. B—insisted on speaking with me. I told her to say that I was not interested. I had warned him several times that he had but one more chance. Not long afterward he had called me from Hartford on two successive days, so drunk he could hardly speak. I told him he was through—finally and forever. ~ A.A. World Services Inc. Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition . A.A. World Services, Inc.. Kindle Edition. There must be rules whether they be called laws or company policies, social mores, or merely common sense. Surely by the time we become adults we know the rules… but why then do we break them so often? And when we do, we lose a job or destroy our families or sometimes do what we know is stupid, trying time-after-time when we’ve promised our boss, our parents, our spouse, ourselves to do what the entire world knows is detrimental to us… even fatal if we don’t slam on the breaks! God, that which I so badly want to do, I do not! I’ve tried and tried! I give up. Tell me what to do, give me the ability to do it, and I will!

to my sponsor's god

you didn’t do bad last night i told you thanks for a lousy day and you didn’t get mad i asked you to keep me clean just today and somehow i am i asked you to stop my dumb mouth at the boss he grinned when i left said i’d done good so thanks for a not bad day can you do it again i’d be much obliged

Refuge in the Lord

Fortunately, we have the capacity to choose, over and over again, the voice we prefer hearing. ~ Casey, Karen.

Each Day a Renewed Beginning (p. 9). Mango Media. Kindle Edition. In the Lord I take refuge. ~ Psalm 11:1(a) (NIV)

What voices do you hear when nobody’s talking? We can choose. We can hear our parents correcting us decades ago. We can listen to the news on either end of the spectrum, at least the one we most often choose to physically hear. We can hear the wisdom of songs we can play in our minds. We can hear our close friends or family members directing our actions. We can hear scriptures whether we could find them in the Bible or not. Or we can hear the still small voice of God. Fortunately, we have the capacity to choose, over and over again, the voice we prefer hearing.

A Little Weird

 

Father Josh at St. Rita said in his homily a few weeks ago that all of the Saints were considered a little “weird”. He said we should all strive to be that kind of weird. ~ Lynette Schnitzius

I Googled “saints who were a little weird”
and got more material than I can use.
Saint Gummarus’s attempts to salvage his marriage failed
and he founded an abbey at Lier,
becoming the patron saint of difficult marriages.
Saint Drogo is considered the patron saint of unattractive people.
Because of Saint Rita’s lifetime of disappointments,
difficulty and setbacks, she is now considered
the patron saint of the impossible.
St. Vedast, or Vaast, is the patron saint
of children who are late in learning to walk.
There’s a book entitled
My Badass Book of Saints:
Courageous Women
Who Showed Me How to Live.
Are you willing to strive to be that kind of weird
that leads to canonization and sainthood?
How embarrassing is it to strive to live
a life that after your physical life has ended
leads people many years later to remember your life
as deserving sainthood?

Saint Drogo, the patron
saint of shepherds,
coffee, and the ugly.
CC BY-SA 3.0

Genuine Humility

 

Genuine humility brings an end to the feelings of inadequacy, the self-absorption, and the status seeking. ~ Overeaters Anonymous. The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous, Second Edition (p. 52). Overeaters Anonymous, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

What is Humility? It is the Spiritual Principle
for Step Seven, “Humbly asked Him to remove
our shortcomings.” Humility
has been described by many people. For instance
Jesse Jackson said, “Never look down on anybody
unless you’re helping them up. urself less. –
C. S. Lewis said, “Humility is not thinking less of yourself,
it’s thinking of yourself less.”
Thomas Merton said, “Pride makes us artificial
and humility makes us real.”
Mignon McLaughlin said, “The proud man
can learn humility, but he will be proud of it.”
St. Vincent de Paul said, “Humility is nothing but truth,
and pride is nothing but lying.”
But I think my favorite is St. Vincent de Paul’s
“Humility is nothing but truth, and pride is nothing but lying.”
closely followed by Madeleine L’Engle’s
“One cannot be humble
and aware of oneself at the same time.”

God Cares for Each of Us

 

A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, 

is God in his holy dwelling.

God sets the lonely in families,

he leads out the prisoners with singing; ~ Psalms 68:5-6a (NIV)

A personal God would seem to be a modern concept,
but obviously it’s thousands of years old.
God knows what we need most and readily meets our needs…
a father to the fatherless, a defender of widows,
provides family members for lonely folks,
and leads lonely prisoners out…with singing!
What is your fondest wish?
Have you sought fulfillment from God?
Ask, and it will be given to you;
seek, and you will find;
knock, and it will be opened to you.
 For everyone who asks receives,
and he who seeks finds,
and to him who knocks it will be opened.
Or what man is there among you who,
if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone?
 Or if he asks for a fish,
will he give him a serpent?
If you then, being evil,
know how to give good gifts
to your children,
how much more will your Father
who is in heaven give good things
to those who ask Him!*

 

*Matthew 7:7-11 (NKJV)

Living with a Paleolithic Brain

 

Junk food, for example, drives our reward systems into a frenzy. After spending hundreds of thousands of years hunting and foraging for food in the wild, the human brain has evolved to place a high value on salt, sugar, and fat. Such foods are often calorie-dense and they were quite rare when our ancient ancestors were roaming the savannah. When you don’t know where your next meal is coming from, eating as much as possible is an excellent strategy for survival. ~ Clear, James. Atomic Habits (p. 102). Penguin Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Why do we crave salty, sweet, fat foods?
Why a hundred-fifty pounds
and decades after the decision
never again to see a figure on the scales again
beginning with a three again,
and more than fourteen years after
making a decision to turn my life
and my will over to the care of God
as I understood God…why is it still easy
to trigger those old cravings?
It seems like ancient history,
and evidently it really is…Paleolithic even!
Could it really be how rare a treat
as the beehive could have triggered me
all these eons since?
I need not yield to the genetic urges!
I can choose a sane plan and live it!

Image copyright: emojiimage

Greater Wisdom

Dear brothers and sisters, I want you to understand that the gospel message I preach is not based on mere human reasoning. I received my message from no human source, and no one taught me. Instead, I received it by direct revelation from Jesus Christ. ~ Galatians 1:11 (NLT)

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We used to amuse ourselves by cynically dissecting spiritual beliefs and practices when we might have observed that many spiritually-minded persons of all races, colors, and creeds were demonstrating a degree of stability, happiness and usefulness which we should have sought ourselves. (Alcoholics Anonymous, page 49)

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Human reasoning.
If I can’t convince myself
right now my own logic
trumps all others,
I look to wisdom
of the elders,
the sages,
the erudite of ages.
Tea leaves, ouija boards,
crystal balls,
divine revelation
feel gullible,
juvenile, naive.
Before tossing bath water,
though,
I should check for babies.

Higher source,
teach me to trust your
higher wisdom.

Foster Joy, Not Gloom

 

Making the choice to be positive rather than negative may not come automatically, but we can practice it. We will feel far better if we do. ~ Casey, Karen. Each Day a Renewed Beginning (p. 142). Mango Media. Kindle Edition.

Is the glass half empty or half full?
It’s a choice, you know.
I’ve got the joy, joy, joy, joy,
Down in my heart,
Down in my heart, 
Down in my heart;
I’ve got the joy, joy, joy, joy,
Down in my heart,
Down in my heart to stay.*
How much more pleasant
to be happy and know it than
to allow concerns to dominate.
What is there that demands gloom today?
Smile anyway. It feels better!

* Public Domain

Credits Without Debits

 

20 Yet he [Abraham] did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, 21 being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised. 22 This is why “it was credited to him as righteousness.” 23 The words “it was credited to him” were written not for him alone, 24 but also for us, to whom God will credit righteousness—for us who believe in him who raised Jesus our Lord from the dead. ~ Romans 8:20-24 (NIV)

Credit may refer to the creditworthiness
or credit history of an individual or a company.
In some contexts it refers to a bookkeeping entry
that either decreases assets
or increases liabilities
and equity on a company’s balance sheet.
A debit is an accounting entry
that results in either an increase in assets
or a decrease in liabilities
on a company’s balance sheet.
If we’re credited with righteousness,
then righteousness is an asset
added to our collection, a value we possess.
In the value we have with God,
everything of value is a gift,
and in our accounting are only assets…
gifts from God, with no deductions
for our foolish mistakes, for our reluctance
to accept all the good we’re offered,
understanding we’ve done nothing
to get in that position except to gratefully accept
what we did not, could not have earned.

Image Copyright: netsay

 

Not Being OK

 I’m not OK, you’re not OK — and that’s OK. ~ William Sloane Coffin

Do you feel guilty, not being Okay?
Does it seem you’ve let the world down
when you’re down?
Does it seem sometimes
you let the world down
when a smile feels fake,
when the world doesn’t suit you?
Does God think you’re not okay?
Does God love you anyway?
If you ask someone who loves you
would they vote you’re not okay
even when you feel that way?
Does God accept you when you don’t?
Does God disagree with your assessment?
Is there truth in “I’m not OK, you’re not OK — and that’s OK?”
May I hug you?

Serenity Is Not

 This is not written by Barbara B. Rollins with OAStepper since neither has internet at the moment

Instead, it is found in Serenity Prayers and Prose to

Sooth Your Soul byJean Cotner

SERENITY IS NOT 

Serenity is not 

A quiet mountain lake, 

Nor a nature preserve 

With only the birds for company, 

Nor release from responsibility: 

KFor the soul determined to fret and worry

 Is little swayed by circumstance. 

Serenity can be

Found in a blighted inner city 

Where every night is shattered by gunfire, 

Or in solitary confinement in a dirty cell, 

Or amid the onslaught of a dozen demands, 

For the soul that rests in God’s peace 

Is little swayed by circumstance. — katherine Swarts

I Am to Blame

I listed folks who made me mad years and years ago, people I resented…blamed them for wrecking my life. But as I looked back now piecing together what happened I have realized almost without exception the fault was mine, the resentment a fictionalized account of truth. That real truth be told… in each case I was to blame.

Resentment

 

Nothing on earth consumes a man more quickly than the passion of resentment.~ Friedrich Nietzsche

 

Resentment: a feeling of indignant displeasure
or persistent ill will at something
regarded as a wrong, insult, or injury
But we don’t want or need the definition.
We agree with Elizabeth Gilbert:
As smoking is to the lungs,
so is resentment to the soul;
even one puff is bad for you.
Charles F. Glassman sets out
the elimination diet:
Remove anger, regret,
resentment, guilt, blame, and worry.
Then watch your health, and life, improve.
Anne Tyler said, “She collected
and polished resentments
as if it were some kind of hobby.”
And Kesha captured the picture:
“Life ain’t always fair,
but hell is living in resentment.”
But the heart of the matter is:
Resentment is a symptom
that somewhere, somehow
I have compromised myself.
~ Dushka Zapata