I fully comprehend
what is said, heard, and felt
all around. What was heard
may well be what Daddy meant
when he told Child Me,
"Don't be sorry, don't do it."
Others may hear a platitude,
words that feel flat, meaningless.
It may be heard as sincere
yet trite, reflexive, inadequate.
Perhaps the words feel real
yet unnecessary, quilt-based.
Perhaps the words most dramatically
affect me. I hear what I say, mean it,
but internalize the words
as descriptive not merely apologetic.
Instead I communicate to me,
"I'm despicable, contemptible,
loathsome, and worthless.
I'm sorry I say, "I'm sorry."
I am willing to have God remove
The empty phrase from my repertoire.
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