All It Took

And I realized that the willingness make the phone call art two the morning was all it took. ~ Vicki W

The big books says we must go to any lengths
to hold on to our sobriety, our abstinence.
If you have decided you want what we have
and are willing to go to any length to get it...Sure, I'll do anything! Lead a meeting,
read a book, write a book, work the steps,
use the tools...well, except that pesky one
called the telephone. Oh, and surely you can't ask me
to put my needs before someone else's.
I'm a codependent, don't you know?
I please people, I don't ask anything of them for me!
My mother would roll over in her grave
if I called at two in the morning unless it was to 911.
My husband's ire is raised after nine if it rings,
so I couldn't do that to someone else...and make him mad
at the same time. But other than those, I'll go
to any lengths. Unless I forget. Unless I get busy
and let it slip my mind. Unless other things nudge
all the recovery things out of my mind.
Unless it's embarrassing or makes me look stupid.
Other than that, I'll go to any lengths, and that, of course,
is all it takes. Going to any lengths because I must act
as if I have a terminal illness. Which I have.