My Life, My Idea

You will never be happy in life if you live someone else's idea of what life should be. ~ Robert Stack

I have tried to live other lives,
to be who my parents wished me to be —
though it seems what I perceived
could have been other than truth.
I have sought to live as my husband chose,
believing if I got to perfection I could heal rifts,
could make a difficult relationship ideal.
I have sought to live by mores and codes
of the South, of rural life, of ages past
only to find I lost me, lived a shell, hated me.
Now I have found a program of promises
of becoming real, of finding true dreams,
of surpassing ideals. And when I stopped
looking to others to fix or be fixed,
I found happiness and fulfillment
I'd always sought — freely given,
mine for accepting.
My life has become My Ideal.