Humility First

By their example they showed us that humility and intellect could be compatible, provided we placed humility first. When we began to do that, we received the gift of faith, a faith which works. This faith is for you, too. ~ Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, Alcoholics Anonymous, page 30.

I'm smart. I need you to know that.
I'll do everything I can to tell you,
to convince you, to sell you
my only claim to self-esteem.
Oh, I know you'll argue, list attributes
besides the brains, but I don't trust them,
don't believe you.
Please don't tell me the only way out
is to abandon that, to humble myself,
to give up the pretense that I'm okay.
How can you suggest I stand here,
naked, without my shield, just me.
Can't I hold on to my honors, and just add
a bit of decorum? Just act humble?
Do you mean I really can't rely on me
and call it faith?