Feelings

What feelings have been given to me that don't belong to me? ~ Glenn Beck

What feelings have been given me?
Then I can sort out which don't belong.
Guilt. Is guilt a feeling. I feel guilty
listing guilt as a feeling. But then again,
I feel guilty about a lot of stuff.
Who gave me guilt? Anybody who ever told me
I didn't do something well enough,
but then again, anyone who ever told me
how well I did since I knew they knew nothing,
that I wasn't nearly as good as they thought.

What feelings have been given me?
Embarrassment about the way I dress,
about the way I wear my hair,
about biting my fingernails and when I stopped
about pulling them off, never growing them
to the point they might look nice.
Embarrassment about not knowing
how to answer a hairdresser when asked
how I want my hair. Embarrassment
that I was too busy with other things
to be a normal teenage girl and learn that stuff.

What feeling have been given me?
Worthlessness for not having done, in advance,
without notice, what you wanted me to do for you.
Worthlessness for thinking I might meet my needs
when you have something you expect me to do
whether I know about it or not. 
Worthlessness for believing I might deserve
more than the bare minimum, even one twit more
than owned by anyone else in the world.

What feelings have been given me?
Humiliated by not being good enough, pretty enough,
attractive enough, worthy enough for your touch,
your embrace, your caress, your affection
for if you don't give it to me often, openly,
with great desire and need to bestow it
then surely it's all because of me
any you have no part in it at all.

What feelings don't belong to me?
Those I have not earned, those that derive
from low self-esteem, those that meet no goal...
those I adopt from a misguided picture of the world
and my place in it.

Be sure you see the name tag...