Whatever games are played with us, we must play no games with ourselves, but deal in our privacy with the last honesty and truth. ~ Ralph Waldo EmersonNo games with ourselves? No spider sol,
sudoku, shisen? Well, there is the obsession
inherent in those for me, but the games I play
with me bypass those, surpass them in perversity.
The games I play with me are make-believe...
pretending I'm doing what to the world appears true —
hide and seek... hiding what I need to use when I choose,
seeking only when the desperation makes me long
for the taste of recovery I'd found before the game —
Instead of games, I must find the courage, the faith,
the hope to deal in solitude with the last honesty
and truth.
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