Since I'm Here

I didn't want to be here.
Who would have thought
two months ago
when I said I'd keep a key
that a day like today would come?
I don't want to be here.
I feel miserable,
back in the disease,
hungover on sugar
and mad at the world.
But I'm the only one
who could open the building
and I knew if I ditched it
you'd all be calling, asking.
I don't want to be here.
But what you say speaks to me.
I needed this. I belong here.
Since I'm here,
I'll come a bit further
along the road of recovery.